Limerence is a term that was penned by Dorothy Tennov in 1979. In her book Love and Limerence, The Experience of Being In Love, she described limerence as a condition in which an individual strongly desires, even to the point of becoming obsessed with, receiving emotional love as reciprocated by another person.
People going through limerence often experience other issues, such as obsessive thinking, unwanted feelings, or irrational behaviors. If a person is already unstable, this can lead to further psychological problems and can interfere with the quality of the person’s life.
Limerence is often a huge factor in love addiction – a condition in which people are so obsessed with the idea of receiving love that they often pursue it despite problems arising as a result.
How Limerence and Love Addiction Can Influence a Person’s Life
Limerence and love addiction can be difficult issues to deal with. There are quite a few reasons for this.
Love addiction functions in a similar manner as any other behavioral addiction. When someone is afflicted with a behavioral addiction, they pursue certain activities and behaviors even if those behaviors pose a risk to their health and well-being.
Gambling addiction is one such behavioral addiction. Gamblers pursue the rush of gambling, even though they frequently lose money. People with a love addiction, on the other hand, pursue love even though they may experience problems in their personal relationships, hurt other people, or fall victim to emotional dependence on other people.
Love addiction is often confused with sex addiction, but they are not the same thing. People with sex addiction derive gratification from the actual physical act of sex, whereas love addicts are interested in the emotional aspect of love. Love addicts may not actually pursue sex at all, rather preferring the emotional security of love.
Love addiction – indeed, any type of process or behavioral addiction – can lead to a number of symptoms that can interfere with the quality of a person’s life.
People with love addiction, or those who are overcome by limerence may:
- miss out on school, work, or personal opportunities because they’re spending time pursuing love or relationships.
- pursue love even at the expense of their hobbies or personal passions
- be unable to properly process their emotions, prioritizing love above all other things
- actually harm the people that they’re in a relationship with, or they may pursue multiple relationships even against the wishes of their partner
- frequently spend time thinking about love to the point that it distracts them from their daily activities
- experience withdrawal symptoms when they are unable to chase love, or when they are unwilling
- spend a huge amount of time trying to organize or develop a love interest with a person or several people at the same time
The desire for love is not a bad thing in and of itself – in fact, this is something that all humans share. However, any behavior can become unhealthy if it becomes an addiction.
Using Somato-Emotional Repatterning to Heal Limerence and Love Addiction
Somato-emotional repatterning is a form of treatment that operates by using the same energy meridians that were identified by Traditional Chinese Medicine. These energy meridians are like an energetic nervous system that directs the flow of energy throughout the human body
Medicinal practices like acupuncture and somato-emotional repatterning help to redirect energy among these channels.
During a person’s life, these channels can accumulate blockages. They can also do the opposite – flood, causing excessive amounts of energy to accumulate in one area. Whatever the case, these floods and blockages can lead to abnormal physical and mental behavior.
It is understood that people with addictions often have some sort of blockage or imbalance in their energy meridians. By using somato-emotional repatterning, a practitioner can identify where these blockages reside and help to correct them.
This can lead a person to return to an optimal state of physical or mental health. However, this process may not always be comfortable: the unblocking of these energy meridians could cause past traumas or repressed memories to surface.
This may initially be uncomfortable, but it’s all part of the healing process. Once these memories, traumas, and/or blockages are fully addressed, the addiction will cease to exist.
Love addiction is a problem that can lead people to experience undesirable situations and symptoms. Being in the constant pursuit of love can damage relationships and emotional health.
Somato-emotional repatterning is a valuable tool for anyone who is hoping to overcome limerence or love addiction. If you or someone you love is struggling with a either of these addictions, please don’t wait. Help is available! Call my office now at (805) 256-0372. Let’s begin working together to break this vicious cycle of addiction.